Getting personal · Social Escapades

October was a lot…#stocktake

I was supposed to do these stocktake posts every month but life happened. Just realised my last life update was in June, when I was Taking stock- May 2021. Now it’s November, where did the time go? October was a crazy month so let me unpack it:

Started a new job at a local university. Feels good to be back in the classroom and doing my bit to share knowledge with the young ones. I finally realised my SA permit is not coming out any time soon and I might as well make myself at home in my own country. It’s been an adjustment but so far so good.

Travelled to Chinhoyi Caves for a weekend getaway and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Loved learning a bit of my country’s history and enjoyed the beautiful sights. My country is beautiful and it was long overdue for me to start exploring my own country.

After walking through the caves
The sleeping pool

Completed a cycle of toxic friendships that was threatening my joy in the past few months. I realised I had started allowing mediocre connections in my life out of some weird fear of boredom. The connections had to go because I realised I was the one losing out.

Connected with a few positive, mature, and grounded souls that have taught me a lot. I value aunthentic human connections and have become very intentional in creating healthy environments for myself. It really is the company you keep…

Moved out of home and out of the small town I call home, Mvurwi. This was such a relief because it came at a time when I really needed to get out. The toxic friendships had created unnecessary attention for me and being in a small town made it worse. Nothing like being the topic of small town gossip to fuel you to spread your wings. I am now trying to find my feet in the city of Harare which is a bit fast for me, but I am sure I will adjust. So far, I keep to my job and to the small circle of people I know because Covid and also because I don’t know a lot of people. I may need to make new friends, but I am the first antisocial social worker you will ever meet, lol, so we will see how that goes. Nah, it’s just that I am an introvert.

Thought about adult relationships a lot in the month of October. Something happened that triggered my thought process to wonder about the possibilities of a healthy adult relationship. I even toyed with some ideas that I haven’t allowed to come to life in a while, like the idea of belonging to someone and actually enjoying companionship. Of course my scepticism rose to the fore and reminded me that the L word is overused and lala land is a place I have no desire to visit. But I did enjoy that little break in my thoughts.

Accepted that family can be toxic and that forgiveness and understanding is possible when communication lines are kept open. Where there is no communication, healing cannot take place. It is very difficult to understand someone if you don’t know them. I am learning to be open to understanding where people are coming from and giving them the grace I would also want to be given.

Saddened by the passing of my father’s young brother around mid-October. The way he died was unexpected and really sad. I pray his soul rests. The whole ordeal reminded me of my late father because my uncle passed away on the eve of my father’s earth birthday. I wish both of them a restful sleep, until we meet again 🕊🕊

Reconnected with some family members I had not spoken to in a long time. It is sad when death brings us together and I wish we could do better. From my end, I can only promise to do my best to maintain the relationships.

Loved getting back to my love of social work again, but now in the classroom. I enjoy teaching and I am blessed to have the opportunity to do what I love. I am still overworked and always busy but I do enjoy what I do, which is a privilege. In these times when jobs are hard to come by I feel truly blessed.

Hated the periods of anxiety that kept recurring in October. I try and manage my mental health but I’ll be the first to admit that my coping mechanisms are not the best ones. I came across a tweet today that made me realise we are many:

It is sad that some people disagreed with her claiming that the author of the tweet was not qualified to make such statements about the people of Zimbabwe. I think she has observed something we should all talk about and stop making light of mental health issues.

Anyway, I do hope November brings joy, love and more reawakening. I am in the mood for some consciousness, I want to do more to stay in touch with my soul and love myself and the life I have been blessed with. Happy new month to you and yours 💞

Love,

GG

9 thoughts on “October was a lot…#stocktake

  1. I am glad that you found your way back to something that you love(social work and teaching). There are a lot of broken people and instead of finding healing or help, they try to crash and beak others. I hope November will be a better month. Take one day at a time and be kind to yourself😘

    Liked by 1 person

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